Previously we have mentioned and met a handful of parents that come through our I Am Gifted! school holiday programmes thinking that they know their kids well. Some of these parents even have the belief that they are always right (check out our previous entries on 4 reasons why you have become the worst parent and 3 common types of parents to find out more).
As parents, we definitely have more life experience as compared to your kids and like the classic Chinese saying: you would have eaten more salt than your child has eaten rice; we are here to share:
3 things that you probably didn’t know about your child:
1. Your child is extremely hardworking
It might be really difficult for some parents to stomach this fact: your child is extremely hardworking, they are very focused, never lazy and are actually super motivated! For most kids, this statement is true whenever we are discussing in the context of gaming, using their phones or simply doing anything that your child enjoys.
We have met kids that are capable of ignoring basic bodily functions and needs like going to the toilet, feeling tired and even not having to eat. Why is this happening? The answer is simple: THEY ARE ENJOYING THE PROCESS.
The key to tapping into your child’s focus is simply to allow them to enjoy what they do. process.
As for now, many kids find learning and studying to be a chore, they hate it because they do not enjoy the process. Now imagine equipping them with strategies to help them enjoy the process of learning and help us discover they are actually more than capable of achieving great results themselves too. When that happens, you will never need to nag about their studies again, they will feel good about themselves when they receive good grades in school and continue to work hard to achieve more! But it all starts with helping them find the strategies required to help them enjoy the learning
2. Your child wants to score As in school too
Believe it or not, when your child does not score well in school, they get equally depressed too. If this feeling is left ignored and not acknowledged, any child will soon learn to get over that depressed feeling and ignore them too. In some cases, it would be more fortunate that they learn to ignore these feelings. We must have heard news of how some young kids are unable to handle the stress and pressure from learning and result in devastating consequences. Now imagine what if we are able to acknowledge this feeling early and equip them with the strategies to do well in school.
Most kids want to do well in school, and they really do. The problem is, they have no idea how. Growing up, our teachers have always expected us to learn, and some parents will pressure their kids to study, but have we ever sat them to teach them and share with our kids how to learn and how to study? The truth is not every kid grows up to discover the learning strategy that best suits them. It is extremely crucial that parents and teachers begin to recognize this simple fact and start exposing their kids to learning strategies before forcing any more subject syllabus down their throat.
3. Your child loves you and want to be closer
As kids grow up and parents grow older, does the relationship grow closer or apart? Every year, a great deal of parents send their kids to the I Am Gifted! school holiday programme in hopes to strengthen the family relationship. We have had cases of kids running away from their homes, who comes to the programme claiming that they hate their parents and siblings, who confess to avoid talking to their parents when they get home and the list goes on.
We believe we have discovered the reason behind. It is not that your child does not love you, but the simple fact that they do not know how. Let’s be honest for a moment, and admit that even some parents do not know how – how to communicate, how to take initiative and how to start the conversation.
For the amount of time that we spend communicating in our lives, many would believe that we ode to be very good at it. Yet, that is far from the truth. Communication is both an art and a science. There are numerous frameworks out there for us to learn from and get better at it. From asking the right questions to including appropriate gestures, when everyone plays a part in the family to make an effort and learn to communicate better, any relationship will only grow closer as the years pass.
There are always two sides to a coin; we choose what we want to see and believe in life. Great parents (like great leaders) are people who can see the best in their kids and help direct them and inspire them to achieve more.